- November 18, 2024
-
-
Loading
Loading
Lisa Cohill walked with her three children the morning of Sept. 27. A sign pinned to her back read, “I lost the love of my life.” That statement alone could mean thousands of things. But coupled with the statements expressed by the signs her children wore, her sign could only mean one.
“You hurt my mommy,” read one. Another said, “You tore our family apart.”
On the morning of the Family Life Center’s Walk a Mile in Her Shoes, an event designed to raise awareness for domestic violence, sexual assault and gender violence, Cohill came out to share her story.|
“We want to show that we made it and that (domestic violence) not only affects the victim and the abuser, but it affects the children, too,” said Cohill, who escaped an abusive relationship in 2013. “They’re also victims, even if the violence wasn’t toward them.”
Family Life Center
In its third year, the Walk a Mile in Her Shoes event drew the most participation in event history with over 100 walkers.
“This event especially is important to engage men in the conversation about domestic violence and sexual assault and to have a lighter side of that conversation,” said Trish Giacconne, executive director of the Family Life Center.
The lighter side that Giacconne refers to is that men who participate in the event actually do walk a mile in “her” shoes. Each man who is up for the challenge is given a pair of red stiletto heels for his mile walk.
“I think it’s important for everybody to realize that this does happen,” John Gilvary said when asked about his participation in the walk. “I think a lot of times we don’t notice it. With recent news headlines, it’s kind of brought everything to the forefront, and it’s important to me. Women are to be respected, and this is a great cause.”
Currently, the Family Life Center shelter is over capacity, housing 34 residents including 17 children ranging in age from 6 months to 17 years. According to Giaccone, the shelter has been at capacity or over capacity for the majority of the year.
“It has been a little stressful on us in that our utilities are going up, food costs are going up – but we’re making sure that we are open and victims know they have a place to stay,” Giaccone said.
So far this fiscal year, the shelter has serviced 165 people, which is slightly less than last year because they are staying longer. On average, residents are staying two weeks longer than they were last year.
“I attribute that a little to the economy,” Giaccone said. “The job market is still difficult. It’s been a challenge for our residents to reintegrate independently into our community.”
In addition to being a shelter for domestic violence in Flagler County, the Family Life Center is in the process of becoming the certified sexual assault center of Flagler County and is currently being mentored by the Betty Griffin House of St. Johns County. The Flagler County Sexual Assault Response Team hosted its first meeting Sept. 17. The meeting was scheduled in an effort to have open dialogue regarding a coordinated response pertaining to sexual assault crimes in Flagler County. Although there are different roles, the common goal is to always respond and properly provide services to victims of sexual assault.
“Working with the Betty Griffin House has been a wonderful experience, and we appreciate all of their support,” Giaccone said. “Our goal is to provide victims within Flagler County the most empathic, professional and comprehensive services we can.”
By the numbers
According to statistics provided by the Flagler County Sheriff’s Office, in Flagler County, there have been an average of 571 domestic violence related offenses since 2002. In 2005, 2006 and 2007 that number rose well above 600. Since 1995, there are been 16 domestic-violence-related deaths in Flagler County and 65 forcible rapes related to domestic violence.
In 2013, the Flagler County Sheriff’s Office reported 42 forcible sex offenses unrelated to domestic violence. Half of those offenses were rape by force. That statistic is up from 19 forcible sex offenses reported in 2012, with eight rapes by force.
One deputy at the Sheriff’s Office who keeps a close eye on the domestic violence statistics is James Troiano.
Troiano is a 27-year law enforcement veteran who spoke publicly about his connection to domestic violence for the first time at the Saturday event.
“As a young man, my father was an alcohol- and drug-dependent person,” he told the walk attendees. “He became very violent with myself and my mother — he beat my mother. I was also the one that my mother took to protect herself from his beatings. I didn’t understand it then, and I am still very upset about what happened.”
Troiano said that as a young boy, it was very difficult to understand why his father would do that to his mother — why he would do that to him and his brothers.
“I never understood,” he said. “But it affected me.”
Troiano said that his experiences have taught him how to deal with domestic violence on the job.
“It can happen to any of us,” he said. “And if it does, don’t stand for it at all. It’s time to take a stand and, collectively, we will do good work together.”
For more photos, click here.
