Xtra Point: Thank God for walls at skating rinks

I stepped onto the skating rink floor for the first time in 18 years.


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  • | 3:00 p.m. June 18, 2017
This wall became my best friend for an hour at the skating rink. Photo by Malik Cooper
This wall became my best friend for an hour at the skating rink. Photo by Malik Cooper
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I knew it was only a matter of time before I would. I’m actually surprised I fell only once — thanks to the wall.

I attended a friend’s party (happy birthday, Isabella Jimenez) Saturday, June 17, at the Skate & Shake Skating Center in Ormond. I last skated when I was 12 years old, but I figured it would be somewhat like riding a bicycle. Although I’ve never taken a break from riding a bicycle for more than five years.

Once I put on my peanut-colored, four-wheeled sneakers, I stood up and began to walk — not roll onto the carpet until I made my way to an opening in the wall to get on the floor.

I took a few deep breaths, watched a few of the kids go by and I stepped into the gravity zone.

It was TERRIFYING! But I didn’t fall, because I can balance myself fairly well, and skated closely to the outside wall.

As I made my way around the rink, a teenager I didn’t know saw me struggling and said, “Is this your first time?”

After telling him it was my first time in nearly 20 years, he responded, “You look like someone trying to ride a unicycle.”

Ha…Ha. But, after I got the hang of it and began to roll around without the wall, I got into my usual trash-talking mode, and I told a teenage speedster that I had almost gotten as fast as he.

He looked up at me with a face of doubt, removed the neon light-up pacifier from his mouth and said, “I’m not even trying to go fast.”

I then challenged him to a race, but he just sped off and left me whirling around, trying to maintain my balance. It looked like a cartoon scene, when a fast car speeds off and leaves the subject spinning in the dust.

Shortly after the inevitable occurred. After several rounds and confidence increasing, gravity finally won. My bottom met the rink. I think my skates malfunctioned or something, which led to the fall.

As I made my way back to the party to my wife, Jessica — Mrs. No-fun police — she told me that I needed to return the skates before I fell on someone or hurt myself. I asked if she saw how I had conquered the rink, and she replied, “No. I saw you fall.”

So I had to return the skates. But it was fun getting back out there — and leaving in one piece.

 

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